Okay… Just read this if you get a chance.
I have a friend, yes, you could look at my very small list of friends and make assumptions, but it doesn’t really matter. My friend, like all of us, has grown older, lived life, and is not a teenager any longer. She, as a woman, had to play the beautiful/skinny game for many years. It was her belief that that was the only way any man could want her. And, BTW, these are things she has talked to me about, not things I am guessing at.
Life goes on, she gets plenty of attention, because, although we rarely know it, we’re all beautiful when we’re younger. The things we judge beauty on really don’t mean anything a few years later when we look back, see a picture of ourselves, or someone we loved/love, and realize how beautiful we were. Maybe it’s the maturity we get as we grow older, something, but I think we all get to a place where we can see it, and I believe that because I have always heard my friends and myself say things like, “I want to get back into those jeans.” or “I wish I looked like that now.” Things like that. We long to be younger and know everything we know now. So, we see it eventually.
So, my friend got men to be interested, and like some women in life, and men, she got used, and she did her share of using too. She turned to eating, maybe drinking too, to take the edge off the unhappiness that comes with that life.
Life moved on, she got married, got a great job, but that habit of solving problems with food/booze/pills/sex (Depends on the person what they use), did not leave her, any more than it does any of us who use crutches to deal with reality instead of really dealing with it.
Life moves on more. She gets heavy. My God! It’s the end of the world! And the way society reacts to women when they gain weight, it must have felt like the end. So the unhappiness gets worse, comes down on her more often, becomes depression.
As a man I decided a long while ago that I don’t care what sort of negative stuff people think about me. Sincerely. It took real effort, years to get that mindset. There was a time several years back when I worked out two hours every day. Excellent shape, but, that was several years back. I’m not in that shape anymore, I know what it takes to be in that shape, and although I may choose to go back there some day, I’m not now. And, do you know who gives me grief over being heavy? Nobody. Because I am a man, and men don’t get it like women do. But, since I’m not a woman, I will never know what it feels like to be in a position where all of that counts against you.
My friend is a beautiful woman. She was a beautiful girl when I knew her back when we were kids, and she still is beautiful. Yes, this is the beauty inside talk, but look at it like this, do you really think you will go through life untouched? Not aging, gaining weight? Changing? Hardly. So, just try to look at things as they truly are. Treat people for real, the way you want to be treated. Help someone with their problems, don’t just criticize them, and take them as they are. Face value. Why is that so hard?
Truly, I would rather have my friend than someone who starves herself to build a body image other people promote, and she is unhappy with. Just saying…
Thanks for reading that. Here are some links to free eBook downloads for you. Welcome to Monday 🙂
Get The first book in the Earth’s Survivors series, Apocalypse free right now!
I-Tunes: Apple, I-Book
Smashwords: All Formats
What am I listening to: Joe Bonamassa – Driving Towards The Daylight: http://jbonamassa.com/ Ashamed to say I had never heard of Joe, and I am a blues fan, and a long time Rochester native. Great stuff.
Hey, Monday is creeping to a close. Hope you are all safe and taking care of yourselves. Be back soon, Dell…
Dell and body image, how to look at yourself, positive attitudes, free eBooks